Chocolate digestive...

A good friend of mine went for an interview today.

We discussed it at length the night before, as he informed me that it was going to be a group interview and he needed to eliminate the competition early on.
"Make some hash cookies, and share them round when you get in...that should help." I suggested.

This evening he dutifully rang me to let me know how he had got on.
"I had to draw something that represented me" he told me, "something that was a symbol of who I am."
"Really? God what did you draw, a bottle of Rum?"
He told me what he drew but basically he confessed to drawing something that they wanted to see, rather than it really being what he thought represented him. So I asked him, what would he have drawn if he'd been honest.
"A chameleon." He said without hesitation.
"Really?"
"Yep. Because they can adapt to any situation, they are flexible."
"Hmm....that could also be that they do not give away their true colours?" I suggested, "that you never really know who they are."
He laughed, "yeah that too."

It made me think. What would I draw? How many of you can think of something that represents who you are though a drawing?

My lack of imagination stumps me, and worries me slightly that perhaps I don't really know who I am.

However, another friend popped round for a cup of tea and a digestive this evening and he informed me that he saw me as someone who was always strong. Someone independent, who was achieving this new single life, running a home etc, and managing to organise things without effort.

This is laughable to me, if only he knew. However he was insistent. "Some men would find that intimidating," he said, "you come across as someone who doesn't need anyone else."

How did that happen? When did that happen? Just because a woman is strong and has an opinion, doesn't mean that on occasion she doesn't need to be picked up and looked after by someone else. We are all vulnerable on occasion and although essentially someone may be independent in their own right, that shouldn't mean that they are independent of other people.

Please don't assume that just because a woman or a man is a strong person, that they don't need others to pick them up when they are feeling down. We have those feelings too...I know my limits, I know my vulnerability but perhaps I don't share it enough with relevant people.

They also say, that the stronger you are the harder you fall. Perhaps this is because people ignore the strong ones until it's too late, not realising that they needed help...because the assumption is that they will always be strong.

So if you know someone who fits the stereotype....do me a favour, ask them if they are ok, and chances are they probably will be...but you never know, someone independent and strong out there might just need a hug and a chocolate digestive.