No Boys on Spa Day...

How do you get six women to stay quiet for more than an hour?

An impossible task surely? One that would require some sort of bondage, a chick flick or anaesthetic effect inducing drugs.

Well no not really; all it takes is a pool, some massage oil and a heated bed and you would be surprised at what they are capable of achieving.

Five other ladies and I spent the day yesterday being pampered and massaged on a treat that we had been looking forward to for some time. The children were all safely ensconced at school and would be picked up by the dad's, so we had a chance to submerge ourselves in some time just for us...without boys.

We had a swimming pool all to ourselves where we discovered that actually we hadn't forgotten how to serenely complete the breast stroke without being used as a turtle/dinosaur. There were lovely ladies who treated us to facial treatments, painted nails and back & shoulder massages....and then there were the beds.

Mrs W and I feel the cold generally before anyone else. We have established between us that 19 degrees is about our limit before jumpers are put on and layers are actively encouraged. So these giant heated beds were heavenly; covered in stones and shaped for ultimate relaxing, chatting and reading the latest celebrity gossip.

Mrs H discovered the beauties of the sauna room, and one by one we all relaxed as we enjoyed the peace of the day listening to a mixture of our dolphin music and the rain hammering down outside.

We could get very used to this...

However, as we are lying on our giant warm stone beds one of the doors opens and our tranquility and peace is disturbed by some loud pop music, and some men working on something out of our eye shot.
"Nooo," says Mrs S in a despondent voice, "No, no, no - there are no boys on Spa day."
We all look at said door and agree, and grumble quietly at the two workers who have disturbed our slumber...thankfully the door closes and we are left in peace once again.

Nevertheless about ten minutes later Mrs S kicks me in a white fluffy slipper to get my attention. It turns out that there is one boy allowed on Spa day. I turn to where she is intimating and see a very nice looking 'boy' coming out of the shower and slipping into the swimming pool.

Using the skill of my peripheral vision I manage to watch him shower, walk, swim and come out of the pool looking like James Bond, and I did this all without dribbling. The only boy allowed on Spa day was a very nice looking man complete with tattoos and muscle definition.

Oh come on, you can't blame a girl for looking surely?
"I thought that might make you happy," says Mrs S with a smile.

The drive home was a lot less raucous than the one from the morning. Six ladies were far more subdued and chilled out, and Mrs S even fell asleep before we were even back on the motorway.

So gentlemen, how do you get your ladies to be quiet for more than an hour? Send them away on a Spa day...it was the best 'No Boys on Spa Day' day I have ever had.