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Wednesday 15 August 2012

Grass on the pitch...

Evening all...


Well, now for reasons I won't go into I have no plans for the weekend. My original plans have been put on hold for a potential/possible/maybe later date and of course as many of my friends are away on holiday, I will have to find something else to do.

I could of course revise for my pending bike theory exam. God knows I need to do it. I have started looking through the book, but I know what I ideally need to do is start testing myself online as I really want to pass. That will kill a few hours.

X factor is back on, I see...and I am a sad x factor fan...the hobbits love it too, and always do their best announcer impression when one of the acts comes on.

So, who can I annoy?
I mentioned my dilemma to a good friend today to see what he was up to. Sadly he is busy climbing Snowdonia this weekend, as you do on a random weekend in August, however he did say had he been free all I needed to do was shave my legs and he'd have been there.

Wow - that simple. If only I had known that little gem in the last few weeks.

We then got onto the subject of shaving...could it have gone any other way really? Our conversations tend to go that way, and being a man of the world he rarely disappoints me.  Why is that some men shave, or prefer their women to be shaved? I asked him.

He didn't really know, personal preference I suppose, however in a distant memory he did feel it was a little bit disconcerting when on a wild night of passion it looked like he may have been sleeping with someone who looked less than consenting age. Ewwwww!!!

Synchronised shuddering...
"Let's be honest", he said, (cos he always is), "if there is grass on the pitch, then I wanna play." Hmmm - food for thought.

"So perhaps keeping the grass neatly trimmed rather than removing it altogether is still OK?" I ask innocently.

"God yeah," he said, "however, it's very nice to actually shave your partner there, very intimate, I got very good at it." He said with pride.

"Really?" I asked, "perhaps you could do it as a new career, cheaper than a beautician after all?"

My friend laughed, sadly he didn't think he'd make a lot of money out of it, as he would enjoy it too much. However, he's good at shaping, vajazzling...whatever I needed!

Needless to say I haven't agreed to allow my friend to assist me in that department - if I require attention I shall whip myself off for some professional attention - but kind of him to offer, don't you think?

3 comments:

Steve said...

If it whipping your in need of i'm your man baby! Just persume the position i'm right behind you.

Wonder(ing) Woman said...

Wow Steve - you old romantic you!!!

Laura said...

Don't shave it, the itching isn't worth it!! Try a Brazilian(man/wax, your choice). I insist. Oh and if you want any insight into piercings in that region give me a shout :) xx