Christmas lists...

My friend J has just popped round on her way to the football.

She is a big fan of the local team and adorned my front door with her relevant teams t-shirt and scarf, singing some random football song.

I make her coffee and she lets out a big sigh, so naturally I ask her what's wrong.
"It has only been two days and I miss it already."
"Eh?" I look at her slightly confused.
"His cock." She states matter of factly, as if I should know this gem of information.
"Oh..." I say, raising my eyebrows.
"It is so lovely." She wistfully divulges, "You know I often hold onto it when we are together in bed, as like...a comforter."
My raised eyebrows can't go any further..."Perhaps you should get one of those kits, so that when he is away, you can have one of your own." I suggest.
Her mouth drops, "What kits?"
"You know, those ones where you can make a replica cock of your husband or boyfriend's cock." I enlighten her, "Unless of course he is a complete cock, then you may not have enough plaster of Paris to do that."
Her mouth is still open, and I actually physically lean over the table and close it shut.
It takes her a moment...but then, "I must have one!"

So we google... Clone a willy kit, $39.95; make a replica of your partners penis and you can even make your own vibrator from the mould.

"Oh my god," she can hardly contain her excitement, "I never knew such a thing existed, how did you know about this?" She asks me.
"I used to watch a lot of late night TV," I explain. "Oh look, this has a four out of five star rating, and listen to this...My boyfriend and I had so much fun with this kit - it's so easy. We even enjoyed a double penetration with him in my back door, and his 'replica' in my vagina...says Elizabeth from Boston. "

My friend can not contain her excitement...."$39.95, that is only about twenty quid."
With that we go silent as Superman comes in the room and brings me his Christmas list, covered with moshi monster requests. "There you go mummy, my list for Christmas."
"Thanks babe, I will put it with the others." I inform him as he walks back out.
My friend looks at the list, then looks at me, "I think I need to do one of them, and I know exactly what is going to be at the top of it."

Gotta love Christmas eh?