The fear of making soup...

Monday morning...ahh the joys.

This morning I awoke bleary eyed...not a good night sleep was had. It is so infuriating when that happens, lying in bed trying desperately to get back to sleep. So first stop after hobbit school drop off was COFFEE!!!

Ahh that's better...sets the world right all over again.

It has been a busy day in all, however I noticed when driving home that my car appears to be making a little noise...humming to itself from underneath. Hmmm...so I do what any single mum on a budget does, I turn the music up louder so I can't hear it. Problem solved!

Don't worry dad...I'll get it seen to...at some point.

So the subject of the day besides lack of sleep, coffee and poorly cars....is the fear of making soup.

I have a friend who has a beautiful kitchen. It is nicely decorated, has a lovely AGA, and is adorned with selective cookbooks and kitchen equipment. Nice huh?

Trouble is...she can't cook, or at least pretty much refuses to cook. She has her new fella coming over in a few weeks for dinner, so two of her other friends and I have been recruited to make the evening meal for her. But it has to look authentic.

"I have a plan," she says to me this morning as we walk up the stairs to the office. "The preparation of the evening has to look as though I actually did the cooking."
"Oh, ok. How exactly?"
"Well, I am considering having a smidgen of flour on my face just so it looks like I have been slaving  over a meal for him."
"Hmmmm, you don't think that might be too obvious. I don't know if there is actually any flour in the meal...what about some mash in your hair?" I suggest jokingly.
"Oh, yes that's better. Bit of mash, a recipe book out, throw the saucepan in the dishwasher etc, and have it going when he arrives."
By now we are in the office and our colleague is listening to this...
"Right," she says to him, "you are doing the soup, J is doing the main and wondering woman is making the dessert."
He turns to look at her, "I am not making the soup, I have given you the recipe. The fact that you are too lazy to peel a carrot is not my fault."
"No," she says, "I can't do it...it will be a disaster."
"Anyway," he says, "since when did you have a dishwasher, and why? You never cook anything."
She looks at him deadpan, "Cutlery." She states.
"Do you need that with MacDonalds then?"
I almost choke on my coffee and she gives me a look that suggests I will be buried six feet under if I don't stop sniggering.

The thing is, she could probably make a very good cook if she set her mind to it. She is actually quite a formidable woman, but we let our fears of what might happen, or might be, stand in our way.  Day to day we stop ourselves from being courageous, because of our irrational thought that the soup might be a disaster...when actually, does it matter?

I have thought about this a great deal today; When my fears have stopped me from doing what I want to achieve, or when I have prevented myself from taking a leap of faith...what have I missed out on?

Because on the other side of the coin, the times I have felt fear and actually gone ahead I have achieved some amazing things, and had some wonderful experiences.

So I have decided that perhaps it is time to embrace the fear more often and do it anyway...god knows I can always make more soup.