The secret...

Last night the hobbits and I had lots of cuddles and read lots of stories in bed together.

Hobbit intuition is very acute and they can always tell when mummy needs an extra dose of hobbit loving...

Spider-Man and I are reading Danny the Champion of the World in bed at night time. We cuddle up together under the duvet and read quietly together...it is one of my favourite times of the day. For those of you who have never read the wonder of Roald Dahl or indeed this specific book, Danny is a young boy who one summer discovers that his father has a secret.

We have just reached the part where Danny discovers what his father's secret is...I won't reveal it here just in case you haven't read it yet, because it is actually a very lovely story.

However, just as I am leaving Spider-Man to go to sleep, he calls after me.
"Mummy? Do all adults have secrets."
I look at him wondering where he is going with this, "more than likely." I tell him.
He thinks about this for a moment, "mummy? What is your secret?"
"I can't tell you that, can I? Then it won't be a secret anymore." I suggest.
"But Danny's father told him, so you can tell me."
I try to think on my feet here, do I have a deep secret that I have never told anyone? Yes, I do, but it is certainly not one I would share with anyone let alone my seven year old son.
"My secret is that I love you," I say, mildly proud of my self for doing the right thing, and I go to leave his room, when he calls me back.
"But mummy....loving someone shouldn't be a secret." He states matter of factly.

My seven year old has actually stopped me in my tracks, and I feel it. You know that moment when someone says something that places your mind somewhere else, or reminds you of something or someone. It pulls inside on your heart and you feel heavy.

"No babe, you are right. Loving someone should never be a secret. You should be proud of it. Because I am."
This seems to satisfy him, and he rolls over under his duvet and calls out g'nite to me.

I close his door as I leave and realise that I am proud of who I love, and proud of my decisions about who I give my love to...and no, it should never be a secret.