Nina Simone...

I have a secret friend.

He is pretty much unknown to many of my friends; they have never met him, never seen him...but he has been there for quite some time now.

He is my secret.
He is always there when I need him. He has, on more than one occasion called me without being aware that I needed to hear his voice, listen to his kindness and enjoyed his insatiable desire to flirt with me.

He is the man who I rarely see...but I know he is always there. Just in the wings...carrying on with his own life, as I do mine...but we catch up probably more often than people know.

He always believes in me. He has this complete and utter belief that I am lovely. (However in truth, it is him that is lovely,) he never throws me a rotten tomato and he empowers me in a gentle, unassuming way and once again I count myself lucky to have him as 'my friend'.

I wish you all knew him; but then if you did, he wouldn't be my secret friend anymore. He is intuitive and would look equally as good in a Fez as Suggs does, and I would still like him even if he was a nomad living under the stars or a goat herder.

He often checks in on me, making sure that I am not behaving myself but I am at least looking after myself. Tonight was much the same. A cheeky smiley emoticon and I know he is there...just checking up on me.
"Tell me about your day..." He asks most of the time, and he is genuinely interested.
"Good, very good," I reassure him... "In fact an excellent day today." I like telling him good news, he has been worried about me lately.

In fact...I feel like I have let him down lately. I have not been the person that he met all those years ago. I have been stressed, anxious and often been found to be metaphorically beating myself with a truncheon. However, things are changing and I don't feel that anymore.
It is great to say to him and to others, all is good...and mean it.

I told him this evening that I would blog about him...so he dared me to fit in certain words that meant something only to him...which I have done...it is a nice way to dedicate something to him.

Thank you for always being there my friend, and after too many years it is time we met for that drink again.

I had a very good day...things came into my life today that I didn't see coming yesterday.

So in the words of Nina Simone..."...and I'm feeling good."