Penultimate...

I had a second date this evening, with a man who can only be described as gentlemanly.

Well, actually that isn't strictly true...

That wouldn't be the only description of him that I could use; I could also say that he was kind, funny, very sexy telephone voice, attractive and potentially was someone that I could enjoy cuddling up to.

However, things never quite go to plan do they? It would have been lovely to have ended this evening with more than just a cuddle, but after an evening of chatting it became apparent that we were not as compatible as we would have both liked.

Wouldn't it have been lovely to have met someone as special as him and for it to have sparked off like these things are supposed to? Alas, instead of something more we said goodbye and wished each other good luck in our future searches.

So to him I say thank you; it is all about the journey, and having you in it made me feel special for a short while, you made me feel attractive and worthy.

People enter our lives for a reason...and whilst I can not say if I did anything for him, I can say that for me he boosted my self esteem at just the right time and at just the right level.

I just feel sad that penultimate did in fact mean final...xxx

Cake...

Pootle is home in just five sleeps...

The hobbits and I are just a tad excited by this prospect, can you tell? We have been counting the sleeps for her return from Oz since about two weeks ago, when she was only half way through her holiday.

The best news is that she is having an amazing time and I can't wait to hear every tiny little detail of what she has been up to, what she has done and check out her photos of Australian surfer type dudes.

I can imagine that the last thing she wants is to be returning to cold old Blighty after having such an experience, but we have missed her so.

Nevertheless, no matter how much I want her back, having some time on my own with the hobbits over the last few weeks has been very enlightening. She will be pleased to hear that I have found my independence and have actually settled back into my own skin again.

However, I can't wait to see her. She gets me, really gets who I am and I miss her trusted advice and general cheeky behaviour. If she was a man, I'd ask her to marry me.

So see you soon Pootle, at least so we can have a civil service and sort the world out again...any excuse for dancing and cake eh?

Too early for boots...

I have purchased some new boots this evening. They are verrrrrry nice :-)

My friend J inspects them, "hmmmm, you can't wear them on Saturday night."
I feel crestfallen, "why not?" I ask her pitifully.
"Not to the pub you at going to...riding boots would be more appropriate and..." She trails off..."it could be the wrong message."
"What is wrong with them?"
"Nothing, I think they are great...but, others around you may think you have a bankroll of fifty's slipped inside of them."

They are not that bad...honest Dad...however, it comes to something doesn't it when you are judged by the boots you wear, rather than the person you are. Isn't that tantamount to 'well she was asking for it because of what she was wearing?'

J is just looking out for my welfare and is someone who's opinion I respect, but I do feel a bit sad that  other people would judge me for my boots...because they give the wrong message.

I want to live a little....my freedom is making me feel very empowered, and I want to wear my boots because I like them, not because someone else might not. Clothing, boots and underwear all have the power to make you feel good, and should be worn in that way not for someone else.

However, I have heeded her words...and I will not wear them Saturday, unless approved by J herself...I trust what she says, and actually do not want to give the wrong impression...well, not this early on anyway.

Snug...

Ok now anyone who knows me at all, knows that I absolutely hate the cold.

You'd think wouldn't you, that it would make sense for me to have stayed living in a warm country, but there were even occasions when I was cold living there!

Even the hobbits complain that I have the heating on too high, and they will strut around in t-shirts while I am wrapped up in three layers and sit by anything that is kicking out warm air!

So you can imagine my complete and utter distress to discover that at 5.30 this evening I had no heating...blind panic came to mind.

So I have to say tonight thank you to two superheroes who came to my aid in order to attempt to assist me with my heating...S and M....honestly that really is their initials...

M attempted several times to get everything lit again, while S googled the instructions on my very old and outdated heating system. They were, quite frankly, a pair of superstars because although they didn't fix the problem they absolutely did their best to try.

So until tomorrow I have no heating. Thankfully I have borrowed a couple of heaters, and prompted by a friend I remembered that I also had an electric blanket in storage...so I am now snug in bed...with my iPad and that is just perfect.

Adrenalin...

 I am little excited....shhhh, don't tell anyone, it is just between us ok?

When I get excited about things adrenalin kicks in and I can't eat or sleep...it is very frustrating but having this much energy can be beneficial too.

I get a lot more done and I am Mrs Proactive...that includes writing 'that novel' as well as the other more mundane things.

However, I must explain; although I am excited I am also quite grounded too. Time is definitely the healer it maintains that it is, and having time to reflect on things makes you remember who you are.

Therefore, I am excited about being me at the moment. Hobbits are happy, I am happy...my friends are happy. Life can't get any better...can it?

Danger zone...

What is it about little boys bedrooms? Are little girls as bad?

In order to complete the housework duties today, I really had no choice but to enter the forbidden zone. The two areas in the house that I try to close my eyes too.

Sheesh! By the end of my marathon session I can now see the floor and there is a bag of rubbish awaiting disposal by the front door, however to get there it took about two hours of organising, disposing and cleaning.

To enter a boys bedroom you have to have a stomach made of steel. It really is no good being a pussy about this; you can find the most horrendous things under the bed, stuck on shelves and yes, smeared on the wall.

*shudders*

You have to be immune to potential mould growing on old apple cores, limber enough to pick up several sweet wrappers and patient enough to organise the DVD's....again.

So I completed my task with an iron will and protective mask. It has been fumigated and will stay clean for ooh, approximately 24 hours...

I suppose it is all relative. I am fairly sure my bedroom was a mess when I was a wee girl, but I really don't recall picking my nose and having no other solution but to wipe what I had found across my bedroom wall...eugh!!!

Until next week....when I will repeat the cleansing process all over again.

Pimping me out...

I have a potential date next week.

I have no expectations about it but I am quite looking forward to it, so let's hope it isn't too much of a disappointment eh? Be rest assured Dad I am just trying a few things on and out...

There is me thinking that it would be nice to go on a few dates with some different people, just to see what else is out there...nothing sinister...playing the field in a low key kind of way.

However my friend J has other ideas.
"So, what are you gonna wear?" She says to me today.
"Hmmm, I was thinking the new skirt."
"Yep, yep, I am liking that...heels, and no knickers." She says instructing me.
"What?" I look at her horrified, "I am not, not wearing knickers...what do you think I am?  I don't do stuff like that, especially on a first date...Not only that it will be bloody cold!"
"Oh go on girl, live a little." She says with a laugh, "no knickers, add a bit of spice."
"Are you trying to get me into trouble?"
"No, I am trying to get you to just enjoy what comes your way."

"Hmmm," I say, "I think you are pimping me out. Are you on commission here? Have you been speaking to a couple of male friends and made some sort of deal?"
All she does is laugh at me, which suggests that may be exactly what she may have done.
"Well, I will be wearing knickers, I can assure you." I inform her defiantly.
"Spoilsport. Let your hair down..."
"Or indeed my knickers..." I reply.
"Exactly."

Wish me luck eh? At least in getting out of the house with my full set of underwear still on...